The Laundry

The Letter

You had a train ticket delivered to your door for a one-way trip to Great Yarmouth for Friday on the 9th September accompanied by the following letter :-

“Dear Sir, Madam, Other,

Welcome to the Laundry, thank you for your co-operation in joining this organisation. As you have signed The Official Secrets Act Section III in your own ink we are delighted to inform you that your selection of field operative has been successful.

Please find enclosed a train ticket to Gt. Yarmouth (with changing trains in Norwich) of which we would like for you to attend. From there you will be escorted to our Training Facility in Dunwich Village. Please note that attendance is mandatory.
This training will begin your introduction and orientation to the Laundry and also start your Field Operatives training Course which will permit you for Active Field Duty.

During this orientation, you will also be assigned your job role within the Laundry during this time as has already briefly been discussed with you when you signed the Official Secrets Act Section III.

Please bring with you a form of photographic identification such as a passport, Drivers Licence, (old) Works Identification, Student ID or other. If you do not have photographic ID, please could you obtain four separate photographs, each from different angles, each of you wearing different clothes with you instead.
Additionally, please bring enough comfortable casual clothes suitable for the coast at this time of year and some spending money for evening festivities. Please note that food and board will be provided as will any training implements you may require.

On behalf of the Laundry Services, HR would like to personally thank you by way of this letter for giving them a sample of your Blood, Tears, Skin, Hair, Spinal Fluid, Urine and Stool so that your identification can be verified if ever the need arises.


The trip to Gt Yarmouth was a uneventful one, it rained as typically it does in September and after leaving any sign of longitudinal peaks for the passed 30 minutes, you arrive at Gt Yarmouth Station.

Exiting the Train, a large portly gentleman in a navy fisherman’s coat with a bald head and large bulbous eyes is holding out a sign saying “Capital Laundry Services” and you are then directed to a mini-coach where there are a collection of different people from all walks of life on board. The ‘Fisherman’ guides on other people and eventually gets on the coach himself and starts driving.

After about an hours journey (it’s now about 4pm), the driver pulls into a small cavern where there is a stone harbour with a two tier boat just big enough to hold a standard class of children. “Only way to Dunwich is by Sea” comes the driver as everyone is led onto the boat.



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